Within in the first couple weeks of my big move to New York,
I have learned a few things. Cheap Chinese food isn’t a bargain; it’s a death
sentence. Your neighbors don’t like you walking across your apartment in tap
shoes. When in Times Square, elbows can be used as weapons. Never make eye
contact on the subway. All of these lessons are important and guarantee
survival in the city, but the most important lesson thus far is the one that
everyone tries to keep secret: no one knows what they are doing.
This is the hardest and yet most
rewarding lesson to learn. I’m a notorious perfectionist and control freak, I’m
the exact opposite of “chill cool girl” (sorry boys), so coming to a new city
with no plan was terrifying. My friends who have already found their way in New
York made it seem like they were having all the success in the world, and, of
course, everyone’s social media posts make it look like they have life all
figured out. Well, I’m here to tell you that is a lie of the highest degree.
Sit down and have a one-on-one conversation with anyone who seems “put together”,
and they will tell you that they are hanging on day by day. Even my boss, a guy
with a great job, a cute family, and a chic apartment admitted that he still
doesn’t know how to “adult”. We are all just floating. The more I began to
realize this, the more I began to ease up on myself.
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| An action shot of me trying to look "put together". |
It took me a hot minute to find a
job here, and now I have one but it certainly doesn’t cover all my life
expenses. That’s ok, I will get a second side hustle and make it work. I
accidentally overslept and missed my audition this morning, but instead I was
able to get my mom a birthday present and work on the blog. I spend all my
money on healthy groceries and still manage to stumble home after work with a
McDonald’s bag in my hand. Well, Hannah Montana taught me that nobody’s
perfect. I think that everyone first starting out needs to remind themselves
that there’s no such thing as a timeline for success. The only person that can
measure your success is you, so there’s no need to compare your life to the
Instagram of someone who “has it all” because I promise, they don’t. Encourage
and motivate yourself to accomplish your goals, but if you happen to slip up,
don’t punish yourself too much, you’re still learning. When you do stumble,
don’t fret; take one hour, eat your chicken nuggets, drink your wine, watch an
episode of “Dance Moms”, and then get right back to “adulating”.
