Have you ever dated a guy who seemed great except for "X"? Have you ever made huge sacrifices for someone who just wasn't reciprocating? Have you ever dated a guy despite what your friends and family think? It's ok, we all have.
Why do we think it's normal to date someone who we think we can "fix" or, even worse, we put up with them and hope one day things will be different? I have dated a couple boys like this in the past, and girls let me tell you, it hasn't ended well. I know we're all guilty of overlooking red flags, but at what number warning sign do we throw in the towel?
Let's go over some common red flags, shall we?
Girls, if your best friend or your mom doesn't like him, don't assume that your best is jealous or that your mom just doesn't "get him"; trust me your mom gets him better than you probably ever will. Your friends are the people you've collected over the years because your share the same values and opinions, so obviously there is some merit to what they have to say about this boy.
Ladies, let me give you some advice that I had to learn the hard way: If he's a huge flirt, that's not going to stop once he starts dating you. He might cease to flirt with other girls in front of your face, but you better believe that the boy will be flirting when you're not around (and you'll have to hear about it from every girl in your department). Also, I am a firm believer in "once a cheater, always a cheater". Bottom line, if you can't trust him, don't put yourself through that stress (you will get premature grey hair and wrinkles, and you just don't have time for that).
My favorite tell-tale sign of a good guy is how he treats other people, especially a waitstaff. You can really get a glimpse of who a person is when they are being helped by others. Here is a tip, if he's rude to your waiter or leaves a small tip, I recommend you leave him at the door.
Finally, one of the biggest red flags is the sentence, "He's a really great guy, but...". LADIES. If the guy in question truly is a great guy, you will never have to utter that sentence. EVER. That is like saying you had a nice visit to the gynecologist; both statements are lies.
So if we see the signs and we acknowledge that he's a great guy BUT (whenever I have a friend say this I get up and leave the table. Honestly, I leave), why do we continue to let the subpar dates stick around? We are all young, smart, vivacious, beautiful, amazing women; we do not have time for boys that break our hearts, we're too busy living life and kicking ass. So, do me a favor as a fellow woman: See something, say something. If you see a bad sign in your own relationship, get out. You are amazing and so worth loving, and I promise you will find someone you deserve....or you will get a cat, which is also a win because they're fluffy and lovable.
